Welcome to I'm Not Buying That, the blog where we dissect the woeful mistakes of the advertising industry. I'm your host, CJ Garrett, and I view terrible ads so you don't have to.

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Sunday, February 27, 2011

Bet you thought I'd disappeared...

Oh no, dear readers. It takes more than a month long vodka-fueled bender to keep this particular misanthrope down. I'm back - with a little more liver damage than usual, but still back!

Anyway. Back to the oh-so-serious business of shredding the dire examples of advertising that are thrown my way in lieu of actual money.

Today's lovely example comes to us courtesy of Paul Schreiber, a guy I don't know personally, but who was fortunate enough to snap one hell of a picture. Behold!

Oh dear oh dear oh dear. Much as this ad appeals to my everlasting dislike of all other human beings, it fails pretty badly as an incentive to get people into the restaurant. Of course, I am making the assumption here that they want to appeal to customers other than psychopath serial killers, and I may be wrong about that.

So many questions... by 'date', do they mean the fruit or the person accompanying you? Why exactly do they encourage people to wait until after dinner, as if the time is somehow important? And what is with those kebabs - they look about as appetizing as a dead hooker OH WAIT.

Sigh. Please, oh you managers of restaurants everywhere - take heed of this example, and try to avoid references to grievous bodily harm when you're in the business of selling food. For everyone else, this was the first result when I searched Amazon for 'kebab'.

CJ, over and out

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